At the table
Your sister is telling everybody about her day. You have something much more exciting to say.
What do you do?
Step 1: What Would You Do?
There is often more than one good answer. Pick one and see what happens.
A friend is upset
Your friend is telling you why they are sad. You want to make it better.
What helps most?
Step 2: What That Was
The name for what you just worked out.
Let the other person get to the end. Even if you know what you want to say.
Why it is hard
You are holding your idea and you are scared of losing it. That is why interrupting happens.
Say it back
Say what you heard in your own words. Then you know you got it, and so do they.
Step 3: Quick Check
Two questions, then you are done.
Question 1 of 1
Your friend is telling you something and you have a great idea. What do you do?
Step 4: Your Life Mission
Something to do away from the screen. Nobody is checking.
Say it back
- Next time somebody tells you something, wait until the end.
- Say back what you heard in your own words.
- Ask if you got it right.
Why: Saying it back proves you listened, and it is the fastest way to find out if you missed something.
Step 5: What You Learned
- Wait until they finish.
- Say back what you heard.
For the grown-up
Interrupting at this age is nearly always about working memory rather than rudeness — a child interrupts because they cannot hold the thought and listen at the same time. Treating it as bad manners misses the actual difficulty.
The finger trick in the tip works surprisingly well, because it gives the idea somewhere to live while the waiting happens.
Saying back what you heard is worth doing to them as well as asking it of them. "So you are saying the game was not fair?" teaches the move and settles most disputes faster than an adjudication.